A small piece of sodium which lived in a testube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Bunsen! my flame! I melt whenever I see you" said the sodium.
The bunsen burner replied :"It's just a phase you're going through".
---
A neutron walks into a bar; he asks the bartender: " How much for a beer?"
The bartender looks at him and says: "For you, it's no charge".
---
Why did the white bear dissolve in water?
Because it was polar.
---
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
A one molar solution.
---
What do dipoles say in passing?
Have you got a moment?
---
Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak?
Because it's in the ground state.
---
What do you do with a dead chemist?
Barium (bury them...just in case u dun get it:D)
---
What weapon can you make from the elements potassium, nickel, Iodine and iron?
A KNIFe.
---
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
---
What did one titration tell the other?
Let's meet at the endpoint.
---
Why are chemists great for solving problems?
They have all the solutions.
---
Do you know what happened to the chemist who was reading a book about Helium?
He just couldn't put it down.
---
Why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia?
Because it's basic stuff.
---
What is a cation afraid of?
A dogion
---
What did the match tell the flame?
Baby, you make me lose my head.
---
Why did the ice cube get divorced?
His wife said he was too cold.
---
Why did Carbon marry Hydrogen?
They bonded well from the minute they met.
---
What kind of ghosts haunt chemistry faculties?
Methylated spirits.
---
If H20 is water what is H20 4?
Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming. . .
---
A psychotic chemist came home from work and had a big fight with his wife. In the heat of the moment, he grabbed a bottle of some lethal chemical substance and forced her to drink it while he screamed: " Die Ethyl, die".
The wife dropped dead on the floor and the neighbors who were watching the scene, decided to call the police.
The policemen arrived and arrested the chemist. One of them asked: Was there any reason for you to kill your wife?
The chemist replied: " There was no chemistry between us. We never bonded well although we tried.In the compound where we lived, our temperaments collided. She always responded negatively to my comments. Our relationship was unstable. There was no possible solution. She had an attitude and I was explosive. Finally, I overreacted. But now I'm glad it's over. I'm in equilibrium again. I will feel free even behind the irons."
---
A group of organic molecules were having a party, when a group of robbers broke into the room and stole all of the guests joules.A tall, strong man, armed with a machine gun came into the room and killed the robbers one by one.The guests were very grateful to this man, and they wanted to know who he was.
He replied: My name is BOND, Covalent Bond.
---
According to a chemist, why is the world so diverse?
Because it's made up of alkynes of people.
(Thanks to Ai Lee forwarding this to me on email)
Friday, October 22, 2004
Tuesday, October 19, 2004
Mamma Mia is in Singapore!
Guess where did I go during the weekend?? To watch Mamma Mia in Singapore!! It is on show until 3rd Dec at the Esplanade. (You know, the building that look like a fly's eye).
I just have to go for it, even though it is so far because I missed it when I was in Melbourne, London and New York. Apparently tickets at these places were fully booked months ahead.
The play is just great, with all the famous ABBA songs being sung. This cast is originally from Australia. It is not any ordinary broadway play like boring phantom of the opera or classic oklahoma, Mamma Mia story line is fully of fun and jokes, colorful dancing.
I really had fun being in this broadway play.
I just have to go for it, even though it is so far because I missed it when I was in Melbourne, London and New York. Apparently tickets at these places were fully booked months ahead.
The play is just great, with all the famous ABBA songs being sung. This cast is originally from Australia. It is not any ordinary broadway play like boring phantom of the opera or classic oklahoma, Mamma Mia story line is fully of fun and jokes, colorful dancing.
I really had fun being in this broadway play.
Thursday, October 14, 2004
Big Fish, Big Feast
Look what have my sister got! She was given this big fish by the restaurant owner that she works for. The owner's friend caught it in the lake michigan. Look tasty? But it is very very smelly when they first got it.
Thursday, October 07, 2004
Psychology Test
There is this test I read on a magazine very long ago that I can't forget.
I assume most of you know who is doraemon. He is a robotic cat from the future, send back to aid this poor soul called Nobita, by Nobita's decendant from the future. Doraemon is deemed to be the super robot that have all kinds of gadgets in this infinity pounch at his tummy. All these gadgets comes in handy when Nobita lands into trouble, e.g. never finish homework in time, being left out intentional by friends when going outings.
So, assuming you are Nobita, and one day you found that you can have Doraemon to help you anymore. You are given a chance to give doraemon to someone else, who would you most likely to hand away Doraemon?
Think. Issit the orphans? Your Parents? A long lost good friend? Someone u met on the street perhaps?
The psychology behind is rather interesting. The person that you will give away doraemon to, signifying that he/she is the one you deemed most vulnerable, perhaps even inferior in your eyes. Take doraemon as something very precious to you, if you would give away it to someone else, that person in your eyes must be incapable of owning the same thing.
Make sense?
I assume most of you know who is doraemon. He is a robotic cat from the future, send back to aid this poor soul called Nobita, by Nobita's decendant from the future. Doraemon is deemed to be the super robot that have all kinds of gadgets in this infinity pounch at his tummy. All these gadgets comes in handy when Nobita lands into trouble, e.g. never finish homework in time, being left out intentional by friends when going outings.
So, assuming you are Nobita, and one day you found that you can have Doraemon to help you anymore. You are given a chance to give doraemon to someone else, who would you most likely to hand away Doraemon?
Think. Issit the orphans? Your Parents? A long lost good friend? Someone u met on the street perhaps?
The psychology behind is rather interesting. The person that you will give away doraemon to, signifying that he/she is the one you deemed most vulnerable, perhaps even inferior in your eyes. Take doraemon as something very precious to you, if you would give away it to someone else, that person in your eyes must be incapable of owning the same thing.
Make sense?
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Reason to get married
While waiting for a friend to go to the bank after lunch, I popped a questiong to my ex-colleague, Grace " Why do people want to get married? Especially seeing the amount of preparations, and heartache, disagreement that two person must go through before finally getting together."
She think think, and replied:
Well, when two person date each other long enough, they became bored and there is nothing else to talk about. So, they get marry and go through all the preparations such as buying house together, marriage registration, etc. This is so as they have common topics to chat on and the relationship can be carried on.
After they get married, the relationship cool down little by little. This time, the couple will think about having children. Children will keep their time fully occupied, and let this couple have more things to talk about. Because of the children, they might decide to take a day out to the zoo, even though dating no longer excites them.
So I carefully lingered on the answer she said, and thought:
What happens then when children eventually grown up and leave?
In my opinion, the couple would go through marriage because splitting obviously is not desired after investing so much time and emotion on this relationship. Unless something unexpected came up, such as discovering he or she has changed, he or she wanting something else in life other than marriage.
Along the way, they have children, they change jobs, maybe their parents/friends pass away, move away. But throughout this life, they discover it is not such a bad idea having a partner supporting each other all along. Even though they do fight and tried to conquer each other, and when they grow old, become weary and wrinkled all over, but who cares, it is this ugly, or once arrogant partner that walk this lifepath together with you all this while.
She think think, and replied:
Well, when two person date each other long enough, they became bored and there is nothing else to talk about. So, they get marry and go through all the preparations such as buying house together, marriage registration, etc. This is so as they have common topics to chat on and the relationship can be carried on.
After they get married, the relationship cool down little by little. This time, the couple will think about having children. Children will keep their time fully occupied, and let this couple have more things to talk about. Because of the children, they might decide to take a day out to the zoo, even though dating no longer excites them.
So I carefully lingered on the answer she said, and thought:
What happens then when children eventually grown up and leave?
In my opinion, the couple would go through marriage because splitting obviously is not desired after investing so much time and emotion on this relationship. Unless something unexpected came up, such as discovering he or she has changed, he or she wanting something else in life other than marriage.
Along the way, they have children, they change jobs, maybe their parents/friends pass away, move away. But throughout this life, they discover it is not such a bad idea having a partner supporting each other all along. Even though they do fight and tried to conquer each other, and when they grow old, become weary and wrinkled all over, but who cares, it is this ugly, or once arrogant partner that walk this lifepath together with you all this while.
Monday, October 04, 2004
Look for Waja When Accident Happens To You?
The thing is that, this guy is great with his thoughts. He has a dream or something like that. He thinks, since that the waja is designed with a safe crumple zone, we should bang onto one on the road if so unfortunately an accident happens. Hmm! What is the logic?
http://www.drliew.net/mt/mt-tb.cgi/1432
http://www.drliew.net/mt/mt-tb.cgi/1432
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